Sunday, June 17, 2007

"Fleetweek, Frisbee, and Crafts"


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For the Thought Police, "Fleetweek, Frisbee, and Crafts" means there are scenes here that depict such times and occurances. It isn't a window to the world conspiracy to make you cry. If it does, there is a power button on your computer to turn it off.

Forty five second music clips from a David Lynch film, the Pixies covering "In Heaven", "Test Tube" by Dekoboko Hajime & Yamantaka Eye, and "The Story of An Artist" by Daniel Johnston.

This episode's links are Save Darfur, National Priorities Project, The Innocence Project

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Part 2, If Rescue Me Had a 5th Season...

The freckled red haired Dominican overhearing Leary's character counseling the gay fireman goes home after fighting a fire. He goes to sleep and has a dream.

In his dream, the guys belong to a club with a nice treehouse. They are squabling why there's never any good snacks around. each time they get their allowances, they pay the club $2.50. The money goes in the treasury can. A while back one of the kids won the 4-H competition for his goat. He on went to become a dairy farm worker. This was 7 years back. The money was $100. He left it for the club house treasury.

Leary's character talks about how their lemonade stand should be pulling more money in and their bait shop shouldn't have to go under. There is no accountability. The monies are shuffled around to get some sort of balance going. In actuality, the $25 bucks has shrank to $9 bucks. Expenses like the wiffle ball set expense are pointed out and the initial outlay for the lemonade pitcher and tumblers.

So in the dream, the gay character talks about how he has to be primary cleaner of the tree house, how he sees others shirk their contributions. Leary's character, then tells him- "the wall of China was built by many bricks", just keep working one brick at a time".

The officer then comments, I know I seem to just be around to wait for what kind of snacks you guys are going to make, but I see him do the hedges alone. The hedges aren't a one man job...

He wakes up.


FADE to commercial

If Rescue Me had a 5th Season...

If Rescue Me had a 5th season and I wrote episodes for it, I would have a character that pretends to be Irish. He keeps his head completely shaved and avoids the sun.

An African American, a second character, observes the cook off between friendly Irish and Italian firefighters.

A third character, is a closeted homosexual. In an act of brotherhood, Dennis Leary's character takes him under his wing. Since the gay character doesn't go to illicit massage parlors or strip clubs with the boys- he gets sent to the medical office for refusing to be "one of the guys".

Dennis Leary's character coaches him- "Tell them you have dreams of just women. You need to rehearse this. You only dream of the babes". In the mean time, he kicks himself for coming along with him when he exhibits a penchant for gambling at Atlantic City, Vegas, and scratch off lottery outlets.

The African American goes to a bachelor party and he and his college buddies take the groom to a drag queen show (music playing is Anita ward's "Ring My Bell") during the night as a joke. The joke is cool until he spots one of the drag queens as the closeted gay guy from his firehouse.

Leary's character catches wind of the situation and takes them all fishing as a male bonding outing. They catch nothing. They decide to pick up sea bass at a roadside stand on the way home.

Someone filling in at the firehouse suggest beer batter for the fish. Flouting the no alcohol ban, they have a fish fry. The bass was excellent and they have a fine meal. Thirty minutes after the meal, they all get extremely sick, starting with the officer. The bass turns out to be New York harbor poisoned sea bass.

Everyone has to go on sick call. The whole house has difficulty breathing, swollen faces and nausea. The whole house is put on quarantine and replacement units are quartered blocks away. The police counter terrorism team responds in moon suits and check for anything suspicious.

The officer who gets sick, gets a ribbing from the command, when they miss a third alarm fire during their illness. The rival fire house makes prank calls pretending to be the insurance agent and inquires if they need a policy that covered ambulance service. It does not go over very well.

TV footage shows the firehouse members taken away in ambulances. Everyone is discharged within 2 days except the guy who pretends to be Irish. His hair grows out and turns out to be a freckled red haired Dominican.

Dennis Leary's character, fooled by the imposter's Irish brogue, does his ball exercise routine pondering what it means to be Irish. Working on his core group, he reminisces about his lost buddies. The music playing in the background is Van Morrison's "Sweet Thing".

He is exhausted and rolls the core ball back to its spot in the gym. He discovers the remaining bottles of beer that weren't used for the beer batter. He puts it in a garbage can and takes it outside.

He sees the African American character come in for work, an hour and half early, like everyone in the firehouse. He says hello, and says to him "I think the cool thing about working in the fire department is the unity in good acts".

The tone goes off and they both drop what they are doing and gear up. It's for a transportation fire, fuel truck vs. a 99 cent store. When they arrive at the scene, guys are laying down foam and news choppers are whizzing by.

The officer and the guys get off the rig, "Let's get to work", the officer says, and the music cues to the Blues Traveler "Conquer Me".

FADE

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Deadline June 15


Watch the Video

The video is not my June 15, 2007 deadline letter to the FCC regarding Net Neutrality. What it is a weekend montage piece I made on my time off from my M-F 7:30 to 3:30 desk duty job I have. The music featured is the Ruins and some stuff from You Tube(youube.com/5secondmovies). There are clips from the news, Mario Savio, Howard Zinn, and Jerry Miller. Tell me- is it better to subvert than to speak out? It's best to take action, to do something before it's too late.

This episode's links are Save Darfur, National Priorities Project, The Innocence Project

Saturday, June 09, 2007

Avoiding Fascists at Your Desk Job

Having a desk job at headquarters requires avoidance of ignorant people. If you are to put on the radio softly, don't play Beethoven, Bach or Mozart. This will invite the fascist leaning to comment "That's standard". Play something like Shostakovich. If you want them to think you're really nuts, piano pieces by Bela Bartok will do the job. If you want to make them think you're sensitive and poignant, Eric Satie piano pieces will work.

Number one though is not to invite or arouse the ignorant with romanticized visions of fascism, boots, leather, blood, land and polish. Keep the Mozart, Beethoven and Bach off the radio. Shostakovich should be looped. If you have Verdi, Bellini, Rossini or Italian opera- keep that off too, lest the ignorant start making Godfather speeches.

Mozart, Beethoven, Bach, and Italian opera is for private consumption.

If you have to have something peppy, John Zorn's The Music of Ennio Morricone The Big Gundown will suffice. It's quite possible racist comments will still persist but at least they'll have to think harder to come up with one.

Finally, if all else fails, Riverdance, Irish stepmusic, and the artwork of Thomas Kincade will act like a stealth shield. If you abandon hope, tune in to WABC am daytime radio. Your brain will turn to mush.

It's incredible, despite the oppression, imprisonment, killings, and war that has gone on that people still insist on being racists, hate mongerers, and horders. The wealth of this world continues to be invisible, if only we opened our eyes.